Thursday, December 29, 2011

New Jersey Night Riders Shirt


For all you fans of Weird NJ and Cryptozoology comes my home state's resident monster out to rip up the roads less traveled. Make this your default shirt when searching out Midgetville, the Marlboro Slaughterhouse, the Pine Barrens and all the other famous (or infamous) locations best gone to at night. You can pick up the shirt here

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Thunder Tankin' Shirt


The most bad ass cat in the Lair out for a joy ride Ed "Big Daddy" Roth style! For sale here

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Further thoughts on the Rankin Bass Timeline

It was pointed out to me that in Rudolph, Sam the Snowman (who I theorized might have been telling a slightly skewed version of what happened since he never actually interacted with the other characters) actually took part in the story by claiming to have sent Yukon and Herbie after Rudolph. Right, he claims he sent them, did you see him do it? I think Sam is just trying to make himself seem important....wait why the hell is Sam alive? Frosty is because of that magic hat and his family because of the charms they wear....hmmm maybe Sam is the far distant future Frosty and bitter at being cast out by Santa so he tells a story of him that is less then flattering?

And I put the Jack Frost special early in the timeline since I figured he was bitter about that blonde dumping him for the pretty boy so his hatred of happy couples led to the whole hatred of Frosty and Crystal, plus you never see the Snow gypsies again...bet he killed them all in his rage over being dumped for the knight in the fancy gold armor.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Unproduced Toy Heartbreak

Oh the things we could have had, behold the unproduced Inhumanoids toys, the Gagoyle and Slither

Apparently Slither made it to the prototype stage and there have been some bootleg figures made from resin castings of this prototype, I would LOVE to get my claws on one



Star Wars Holiday Special - well the Good Part anyway


The part with Boba Fett...

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Thursday, December 15, 2011

TMNT - We Wish You a Turtle Christmas


Yer ol' pal Fink keeps searching the webs for the weirdest and wildest Christmas Specials and boy is this a doozy,

found thanks to Shit Movie Fest...



Arcade Attack

From 1982, SilverBall Heroes vs the Arcade Invaders

I caught this once on HBO as an in between their movies and I finally tracked it down so that others can enjoy...so enjoy it already!

The Real Ghostbusters - Xmas Marks the Spot


Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

The Most Horrible X-Mas Ever


Creepmas - A Krampus Carol

From the twisted mind of Chef Anthony Bourdain comes, A Krampus Carol

Creepmas - Boris Karloff reads The Year Without a Santa Claus

Presented on this last day of Creepmas, the story of "The Year Without a Santa Claus" as read by the legendary Boris Karloff. I know what you're all thinking, no Fink, he narrated "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" and, yes, he did narrate that but he also recorded a narration of the original story that became the Rankin Bass classic. Now you may be disappointed to find out that, even though the basic story is the same, the stop-motion animated special we know and love added quite a bit to the story. There's no Heat Miser or Snow Miser here, no Jingle or Jangle the Elf, no Mother Nature, not even Mrs. Claus. The only characters that appear in both the story and the animated special are Santa and the little boy named Ignatius Thistlewhite. Now sit back and let Grandpa Boris read to you....

Creepmas - The Witch's Christmas


From Norman Bridwell, creator of the Clifford the Big Red Dog books, comes 1970's The Witch's Christmas















Saturday, December 10, 2011

Creepmas - Rankin Bass Krampus Night


Krampus Night is almost impossible to find with  Rankin Bass disavowing any knowledge of the 25 minute cartoon's existence. I have been searching for years to find an actual copy and the closest I can come is this DVD mock up for the unreleased title.

From information collected from various sources the special focused on a modern (early 80's) toy company exec Filmore Clutch, that used his fortune to release the hot toy of the year and to release it for free but only to kids who could prove themselves naughty and therefore would not be receiving presents from Santa. Since kids all over the world want the toy, thanks to subliminal advertising, they all behave as naughty as possible to receive it from "Uncle Clutch". The influx of naughty ratings of children into the north pole results in the weakening of Santa Claus who travels to New York to confront "Uncle Clutch". The weakened Santa is easy prey for Clutch who locks the Christmas Icon away in his own private jail. With Santa gone and the naughty list set to go critical an ancient fail safe is activated and, as Mrs Claus states, the List Keeper is being unleashed.

From a cavern under Santa's Castle comes, according to the back story we are given, the last of the Kringle Elves - Krampus Kringle - who toiled for years with the task of keeping the list of naughty or nice and doling out the punishments to the naughty until his body twisted into a red skinned coal eating abomination that lives only to punish. Santa had him locked away centuries ago to protect the children of the world from his overzealous actions. It is alluded to that Krampus played Judge, Jury and Executioner to the naughtiest of children, one of the reasons the special aired only once. Mrs Claus pleads with Krampus about what has happened and with great flourish and a fantastic musical number set to Alice Cooper's "No More Mister Nice Guy" the Krampus leaps into action. In the end Santa is saved, the children released from the spell of Clutch's subliminal advertising return to being good and the Krampus drags off an unrepentant Clutch into the caverns under the castle. It can be surmised this is the Rankin Bass version of naughty children being dragged to Hell by the Krampus.

There are several factors as to why this special aired only once and has never seen a release on home video or DVD. First is the a fore mentioned scene depicting Krampus appearing to execute children he deemed naughty, second was an unfavorable reaction to injecting the Devil like Krampus into the very happy world of Rankin Bass Christmas specials by the Parent/Teacher Decency League who also took offense to the use of Alice Cooper music and the Krampus being voice by KISS bassist Gene Simmons. Most however feel that the special has been buried due to the threat of legal action by Donald Trump, who took great offense to the character of Clutch and his appearance closely matching the real estate tycoon's own image. As fans of the many holiday specials of Rankin Bass continue to hope that one day Krampus Night will be released to the public those with inside knowledge remain steadfast in their belief this day will never come.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Rankin Bass Continuity Timeline

Best as I can figure it...

Santa Claus is Coming To Town
Night Before Christmas
Leprachaun's Christmas Gold
Jack Frost
Year without a Santa Claus
Frosty
Frosty's Winter Wonderland
Rudolph (problems arise here as this Santa is different and so is Mrs Claus, lets assume that this is merely because of the point of view of a Snowman who may have little regard for the pesky warm bloods, think about it, Sam does not interact with any characters in the story he tells)
Rudolph's Shiny New Year
Rudolph and Frosty's Christmas in July (Rudolph's real origin is told and seems more in line with other Rankin Bass Specials and includes appearances by Big Ben from Shiny New Year and Jack Frost)
Rudolph and the Island of Misfit Toys
Miser Brother Christmas

Creepmas - How to Survive a Zombie Holiday


From the lovely Team Unicorn comes this instructional video



Creepmas with Elvira



Creepmas - Nightmare Before Christmas Decorations

Okay...I'm jealous...





31 Years Ago...

31 years ago an asshole robbed us of a genius...



Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Creepmas or Geekmas?

Who cares it the Lobo Paramilitary Christmas Special!!!!!




A Creepmas Commercial for Captain Spaulding's Museum








Ahhh Gotta love those local access Creepmas Commercials right kiddies?

Creepmas - Haunted Mansion Holidays





Every year in Disneyland the Haunted Mansion is shut down so the illustrious characters from The Nightmare Before Christmas can take over the Mansion and add a little Creepmas Cheer. I've never been fortunate enough to attend as I've never been to California but I have hopes that one day the trend will spread to Disney World's Haunted Mansion, until then, be like me and live vicariously through this POV video of the ride.










Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Weird NJ Creepmas Jersey Devil




Oh, you believe in Santa but not the Jersey Devil?

Did this a few years ago for the guys from Weird NJ

Monday, December 5, 2011

Another Reason to HATE Universal Studios

My wife's Uncle Frank, some of you may know as Uncle Freak, was one of my closest friends and a huge Universal Monster fan and a HUGE Creature from the Black Lagoon fan, I mean that was the majority of his collection of monster memorabilia. He passed away in August after a long and painful battle with cancer. If he were alive today he'd be one livid mother f'er, I's sure he's raising Hell in the afterlife over this.

By this I mean the fabulously stupid and demeaning Universal Studios Creature from the Black Lagoon - A Raging Rockin' Show...excuse me a minute...I just threw up in my mouth...

Okay I'm better now...

Anyway, apparantly the same bone heads that decided no one that visits Universal Studios wants Universal Monster merchandise got it in their think friggin heads that what the world needed was a rock opera based around a Universal Monster. Now I'm not talking about the Beetlejuice Rocking Monster thing or whatever it's called in Florida, we'll let that one slide because the Bride in it is a hot little number and I have a thing for the Bride of Frankenstein anyway. No these bone heads said lets make a musical, Hey! Let's make it with the one Universal Monster that can't friggin talk...cause he's a fish man....Yeah! Then we won;t have to make a new movie with him because everyone will hate the character....jerks...

What? Think I'm being harsh? Here's the actual plot synopsis of the show;

"Universal Studios Hollywood introduces “Creature from The Black Lagoon—A Raging Rockin’ Show,” featuring an all-original score and dazzling Broadway-level production values in a hip, musical stage adaptation of the Universal horror classic, opening exclusively at The Entertainment Capital of L.A. on July 1.

The new musical attraction has an approximate 25-minute running time and a storyline that has been updated from the original screenplay to infuse romance and comic relief with extravagant stagecraft, acrobatic choreography and a hilarious and contemporary musical score certain to keep the production moving at a sizzling pace.

Audiences will be immersed within a menacing Amazon environment, completely enveloped by the exotic sounds of the jungle as they watch the twisted love story between beauty and beast unfold. From the production’s first moments, guests will be thrust into an unexpectedly outrageous, bizarrely romantic, melodic and often outlandishly comic adventure as this monster classic is re-imagined for the 21st Century.

“Creature from the Black Lagoon—A Raging Rockin’ Show” is being realized for the stage by Universal Creative and an award-winning theatrical production team drawing from the best of Broadway that includes, Director Gerard Alessandrini, best known for creating, writing and directing all editions of FORBIDDEN BROADWAY and FORBIDDEN HOLLYWOOD; Tony Award®-nominated Choreographer Lynne Taylor-Corbett, whose credits include Footloose, starring Kevin Bacon and Bewitched, starring Nicole Kidman; Scenic Designer James Youmans, whose credits include Broadway’s WEST SIDE STORY and GYPSY, starring Patti LuPone as well as Barry Manilow’s Showstoppers International Tour; Creature & Puppet Designer Michael Curry, one of the world’s leading production designers and whose credits boast THE LION KING the 1996 and 2002 Olympic opening and closing ceremonies and Cirque du Soleil®; Fly Sequence Designer Paul Rubin, whose accomplishments include elaborate aerial stunts for WICKED, PETER PAN, and the Tony Awards®; and Producer Marc Routh, whose Broadway credits include, LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS, GYPSY, starring Patti LuPone, Mel Brooks’ YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN and THE PRODUCERS."

Here's testimonial from a poor sap that had to sit through this:
"The show opens with a massive screen over the stage, and we watch a clip from The Today Show with Matt Lauer, and they're talking about the Creature. And they set it up as if Universal made the film based off of a real creature, and how a new team of explorers are going after it. HOWEVER, when we finally see the new guys and gals, they're still dressed as if in the 1950's... So that's a little confusing!
The first song, "BLACK LAGOON" is horrible! It sticks in your head all day and haunts your nightmares even! This is CapitanA Miranda's song...yes, Capitana! They made the captain a woman. This song goes on to tell "even the water smells like cheese in the Black Lagoon... Even the Disney Cruises flee from the Black Lagoon." It's horrible!

The second song is Kay's song, and it's actually really good. It's part of the swimming portion, which is done with wires above the audience. The Creature comes out and swims with her as she sings, and that number ends when he starts grabbing at her. So that's a good scene... the only one in the whole show. I mean it's really good and feels like the film! But it can't save the show!

The next song is "Prime Evil," which is everyone singing about the Creature! And then the Creature climbs onto the boat and starts singing too! They even poke at it during the song, "Oh no, he's going to sing!" I mean really?? Come on! This is a doo-wop number too!

Then the Creature kidnaps Kay and takes her back to his lair, which now has a little couch type seashell for her to sit on, and even a mini-bar type area! And of this is where they do their duet, "Strange new hunger." OH, I forgot, this is also where the Creature speaks, and for whatever reason, he's British! After the song, Mark and David rush in to save Kay. Before she goes, the Creature tells her his name....GIL! He gets shot with a speargun, and that ends that scene.

The next scene, they're all back onto the boat, but now we hear massive footsteps... think King Kong! See the image of the Creature on the poster above where he's massive and holding the boat? Yeah, that's the ending. How's he get that big you ask?? Well one of the guys on the expedition shoots him with a speargun, but the spear fell into his mail order supply of male enhancement cream! I SWEAR TO GOD! Kay realizes she loves Gil, and goes to him. He lifts her up, she sits in mouth and sings a little more, then he eats her. That's the end of the show! "

WOW....JUST WOW....
Ya know what, you all be the judge...watch it yourself...

















Ho ho ho, the Creature grows to 25 feet tall because of penis enlargement medication, what comedic genius, this type of comedy brilliance is so wasted here, this brain trust needs to be writing on feature films. What really burns my ass...it's a pretty nice Creature design.might have made a decent version for a serious film....Gah...MUST SMASH SOMETHING...

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Monster Art for Charity

I'm working with MonstersForCharity to raise money for Toys For Tots by auctioning off signed prints and sketchcards...



Devil Dinosaur vs the Herculoids Print starting at $10


Great Cthulhu Print starting at $10

 Marx's Great Garloo and Son Print starting at $10
  Ideal's King Zor Print starting at $10

Ideal's Odd Ogg Print starting at $10

Remco's Horrible Hamilton and his Invaders Print starting at $10


Snappy the Bubble Blowing Dragon Print starting at $10



Cereal Monster Puzzle Sketch Cards Set starting at $10

You can go here or here for info on bidding
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